This morning I attended Annie's hot vinyasa practice at OnyxMind&Body. She is a wonderful teacher and I usually find her classes very calming and relaxing (Namaste!). However, it was one of those days where I could not enter fully into my practice. I was edgy and fidgeting and uncomfortable. Not a very enjoyable feeling. This probably did not have so much to do with my physical condition, but with my mental state. I just had to accept my current state of being and yield to child's pose after a few minutes into class.
Child's pose
Afterward, I thought about what was really bothering me. I was at unease today. I was thinking about the lifestyle and career I recently left behind and was allowing my shadow of the past to interfere with my present. I am enjoying my newfound freedoms and activities, but occasionally I have a sense of guilt, perhaps, or a feeling of a lack of responsibility. Shouldn't I be saving for me and my family's future? Am I contributing enough to my family's well being and security? I am sure that we ALL feel this way some of the time. More than is healthy, probably!
This is where I need practice in learning to relax and to JUST.LET.GO! Dwelling on the past is not benefitting my current situation and I have been given a fabulous gift to enjoy for however long this stage of my life lasts. I need to allow life to happen once in a while instead of herding it in the direction I think it should go. =) Sometimes this is easier said then done!
Here is a fantastic yoga quote (Buddha) that is similar to the mantra shared in our yoga class today;
“The secret of health for both mind and body is not to mourn for the past,
not to worry about the future, or not to anticipate troubles,
but to live in the present moment wisely and earnestly.”
— The Buddha
Sometimes it takes courage to blaze new trails in your life. Sometimes it takes courage to reach out to help someone else. Sometimes it takes courage just to be still and b-r-e-a-t-h-e...(ahhhhhhh!).
I hope that some of my readers are able to take some hope and sense of peace from my blog entry today. I can totally empathize if any of you are feeling the same way!
In closing, I wanted to share with you my friend Jocelyn's blog. She has had a challenging year overcoming Non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma and her positive outlook is such an amazing inspiration to me! Please check out her blog (http://mynhlfight.wordpress.com/) to hear her story!
P.S. I "Steam-Rolled" Frank's head about 10 times last night as my daily exercise, as he was wheezing in laughter.
Hang in there, baby! You're doing great! :)
ReplyDelete